


Night changes

by Inspirationfeedscreatiivity



Series: For your pleasure [2]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F, Hospitals, Major Character Injury, cuteness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-08
Updated: 2015-07-08
Packaged: 2018-04-08 06:16:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4293927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inspirationfeedscreatiivity/pseuds/Inspirationfeedscreatiivity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Okay so a prompt could be like Raven or clarke asking the other to move in with them????</p>
            </blockquote>





	Night changes

She looks pale. Really pale. But at least the steady rise and fall of her chest can chase Clarke's fear away, even though it has rooted itself in her core. Clarke had never been good at losing people, she still wakes up cold sweating from dreaming about her father, but nearly losing Raven was beyond nightmares worthy. When she got the call from the hospital, her heart stopped, time kept on running and everyone kept on moving, but her heart stopped the second Raven's name reached her ear. She's not sure it's even beating right now, even though doctor after doctor have stopped by to reassured her that Raven will be fine. 

Or alive, fine is a stretch Clarke knows better than to believe. 

Clarke's blue eyes have yet to see the damage. She knows, even understands, that under that blanket that covers Raven's bruised body she's more than just bruised. Clarke knows, and understands, that when Raven wakes and asks about her recovery she'll not accept the answer she'll get. 

Raven is the definition of reckless. She was forged in dark fires and forced to grow up before she knew the meaning of it. When life decided to sweep the ground from out under her feet so that she would free fall it did so in a big way, but that wasn't enough. It just kept on giving her nightmares, it handed her pain packed like birthday presents and whispered lies until she got addicted to being numb. She became the definition of reckless. She _is_ strong, determined, headstrong, pushy and loving. Even though she's known heartache all her life, she's good and believes in love. She's survived because of her talent and drive to keep on going, to never give in.

This is going to make that harder. It will make her blind to the possibilities her life still treasurers. This will destroy her.

Clarke forces her lungs to take a deep breath, taking deep breaths is the only thing she can do to calm her nerves. There are things life has prepared her for, med-school has taught her a thing or two too, but the way she's feeling right now for hospitals and _this_ specific hospital bed is all kinds of wrong. Her hands won't stop shaking, no matter what she does. For what it's worth, she's kind of happy about it. She had been dealing and questioning her feelings for so long, but this, this proves that the words lingering on her lips are true. 

Her feelings for Raven are true.

She should have guessed it a long time ago. When she started memorizing Raven's coffee order so that she could bring her some coffee in the morning when she was three steps from collapsing in her seat. When, more often than not, she happened to need Raven's help, even if her knowledge started and ended with the construction of a engine. (Still, her thoughts on life was more philosophical than all her professors had ever been.) She should have guessed that all of that time spent in simply each other's presence would do something to her. Clarke closes her eyes and hides her face in her hands. It becomes too much sometimes, especially now when she has spent hours upon hours trying to convince herself that the girl laying in front of her, covered in white blankets with her head resting on a propped up pillow, with machines hooked up to her system, that she will be okay.

A little cry, soft and ever so quiet, reaches Clarke, who immediately removes her hands from her face. Raven's eyes are narrowed, but slowly opening. Another cry leaves her parted lips. Then she tries to sit up.

"Hey you", Clarke whispers and leans forward, her hand reaches out for Raven's and when she connects their fingers Raven turns. "Take it slow okay, you're probably still a bit dozed off from the anesthetics". Raven seems confused by the way she completely stops in the movement, but then nods a little, maybe even understanding, and lets herself lay back down again.

"Clarke". She sounds relieved and confused at the same time. Clarke can't blame her for that. Nothing about waking up in a hospital bed could possibly make any sense.

Clarke braces herself and gently squeezes Raven's hand caught between her own. "Do you remember what happened?".

Raven closes her eyes and when she breathes out, Clarke has to remind herself not to stare, to not get lost in the beauty of what is Raven Reyes. Raven licks her lips and shakes her head, still eyes closed. "No, I mean, maybe, it's all blurry and I can't -".

Clarke cuts her off as soon as she heard the tremble in Raven's voice. "It's okay, it's okay. Take your time", she reassures her and offers a calming smile. The last thing she wants is for Raven to fall into pieces.

Clarke watches as Raven takes a deep breath and then she frowns in that cute way she does when she concentrates. "I was going for the goal and I saw something beside me as I launched forward", she says and Clarke swallows hard. When nothing happens Raven opens her eyes and meets hers, they look for an answer and Clarke doesn't know which one to give her. "Clarke".

She decides on filling in the blanks first, maybe that will keep her occupied for at least a moment longer.

"She's suspended, banned from ever playing again if Wick gets to the head off the committee", Clarke tells her and grinds her teeth at the thought of that girl. She´s lucky Clarke doesn't know her name, because it there´s anything she can't stand it´s watching the people she loves hurting. Her anger is calmed though by the fact that Octavia was playing too and if Clarke can get to the point where she considers redecorating that girl´s face, Octavia´s already charged with murder.

"She shoved me, I fell and hit something, I could feel it dig into my back and then the sound of something breaking, like a branch or something", she talking more to herself now and Clarke notices the way she tries to understand it, but that frown doesn't fade.

She won't understand unless someone tells her.

"I'll go get the doctor, he should explain", Clarke mumbles and brace herself to stand up and leave for the door, but Raven pulls her hands closer and keeps her down.

"Explain what?". Clarke turns her face away so that Raven can´t see the pure expression of fear on her face. Her heart thumps hard in her chest. "Clarke?", she asks and when Raven laces their fingers together Clarke knows that she can't leave without sacrificing her own arm in the process.

"The rock you landed on didn't just cut you, it hit several nerves and-". She licks her lips and sighs as she feels Raven´s thumb caress the back of her hand. "I really should go get the doctor. My mom is her, you can talk to her".

Clarke turns to the girl in the midnight dark hair and a pair of just as dark eyes finds hers. "Tell me", Raven begs.

(Her heart breaks a little at the sound of her vulnerability. Clarke wonders if she already knows. If she's already read the answer on her face.)

"You're paralyzed, your left leg is. They're not sure the extent of it or if it's permanent, but from what they could see after the operation you're paralyzed from the thigh down", she says, quickly but with a careful voice so that she doesn't stumble over the words. Raven nods quietly and turns her gaze forward, disappears into the white of the walls and doesn't say anything at all.

The sound of the door being pushed open breaks the silence that has been pounding in Clarke's head for the last twenty three minutes. She relaxes into the chair as her mother steps up next to her with Raven's chart in her hands. "Hi mom".

"Clarke. Hi Raven, how are you feeling?".

Raven nods and smiles. It doesn't reach her eyes. "Okay."

"Good, as long as you're not in any pain it's a good sign. Okay, I'm going to look over your stats. Alright?"- Clarke watches she slight change in Raven's face, the tension around her eyes and the twitch in at corner of her mouth, really all of her body tenses up.

"Alright".

Clarke doesn't believe for a second that Raven feels comfortable doing this, but she also knows that she understands that this is the only way they'll get any sure answers.  
Clarke notices the look her mother directs her and stands up. "I should go", she says and reaches into her pockets - a nervous habit.

"Please don't", Raven tells her and Clarke´s heart almost jumps out of her chest. Raven´s eyes are on her and waits for her to answer, so she sits back down and nods reassuring to the other girl.

(She would never leave if Raven ever needed her.)

Her mother offers them both a smile and then turns to the chart, her eyes wander to the machines and Clarke follows them for a second. Then she turns fully to Raven and tries to detect the things only her eyes will tell, the things she won't let turn into words. 

"Your blood pressure looks fine and so those your responses. I'm going to check your mobility now, you tell me when you feel something. Can you feel this?", she tells Raven while she slowly uncovers Raven's feet and drags a pen under her right one. 

Raven nods, eyes filled with relief. "Yeah".

Clarke breathes out quietly and slowly.

"That's good. How about this?", her mother asks and does the same under Raven's left foot. Clarke watches and then peeks over to Raven, who´s eyes is now fixed at the ceiling.

"No".

"Anything here?". Clarke begs, really begs and prays for Raven to say yes, for her to light up and tell them that ´yes, I can feel that´. She doesn´t. Raven breath is shallow and Clarke can't squeeze her hand harder without actually breaking something, and Raven squeezes right back. Maybe they could just break each other and wake up from this nightmare. "It's okay. Do you feel this?", her mother asks and moves up to Raven´s ankle.

Raven doesn't answer. She only closes her eyes, tears slipping through her guard and dancing down her cheeks. Clarke turns to her mother, panic written all over her face. Her mother only smiles in that tired way she normally does when she doesn't know what else to do, but her hand keeps moving up Raven's leg, poking first gently and then harder on each spot she stops at. But she doesn't ask again if Raven can feel anything at all. 

Maybe because she doesn't believe she can at all.

"I can feel that", Raven breathes and Clarke turns to her again to find her opening her eyes, they are now read with tears but there´s confusion too.

Her mother´s smile changes into something tender. "Okay", she replies and writes something on the chart.

Raven still looks confused and as does Clarke.

"Mom?", she asks and feels Raven pull her hand to closer to her body.

"It's what we feared. The nerve damage to your back as caused you to lose both sensation and mobility of your left leg, but fortunately it wasn't as bad as we thought", her mother answers and Raven scoffs.

"So the knee down isn't bad enough?".

Clarke´s gaze is apologizing when she meets her mother´s who only sighs and covers up Raven's legs again. "I'll leave you two alone for a moment".

Clarke waits for the door to close with that familiar click before she breathes out and leans forward so that she can take both of Raven's hands again. "What do you need?", she asks and Raven shakes her head.

"Besides a reason not to kill myself", she mocks.

"Raven".

The dark haired girl turns at the sound of her name and those dark eyes are on Clarke´s like fires. "Soccer was going to be my ticket out of here, Clarke. I can't stay in this town and just be what? Crippled? I can't live like this, let alone not go insane I don't get to work or..."

"Move in with me", she says and does so without processing the words and their meaning.

Raven frowns in confusion - it puts out those fires, thankfully. "What?"

The thought has been playing on Clarke's mind for longer than she has spent in this chair by Raven´s side. Longer than her heart would like to admit.

"You heard me", she replies with a smirk.

Raven laughs and pulls her hands out from under Clarke´s grip and runs both of them through her hair. "Stop joking around", she tells the blonde.

"What makes you think I'm joking? It's a brilliant idea. You need to recover and we both know that the only other person besides Octavia who doesn't flinch every time you lose your shift, is me. So, you come live with me, for the time being", Clarke answers without looking away for a second and Raven looks back at her in disbelief. "If ,when you're back on your feet, don't feel like being around me the most part of the day you can move back to your dorm", she continues to smooth over her proposal.

Those dark eyes fire up again, but this isn't the burning kind, and they are once again filled with tears. "Clarke", Raven's lips forms her name with care and leaves it hanging in the air as a replacement to three words she'll come to use more and more often after today.

"As long as you don't bring home some douchebag or sorority girl, I can live with your moodiness", Clarke teases and leans back in her chair, heart thumping hard against her ribs and singing loud in her chest to the rhythm of her pulse.

"Clarke I can't-".

Clarke reaches for the stack of magazines laying around next to the nightstand to her right and throws Raven one before flipping one open herself. "It's settled then. We're roomies", she tells her.

In the corner of her eyes she watches one single tear run down Raven's cheek without her catching it and then she opened the magazine Clarke gave her, all with a smile lingering on her lips like a promise of an never ending love.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on inspiration-feeds-creatiivity.tumblr.com


End file.
